Here's where the "Diary" part of my blog comes in... So last year my school adopted the Z.A.P. program, also known as Zeros Aren't Permitted, whereby a student who came to one of their MESH (Math, English, Science, History) classes without their homework, would be "Zapped." This includes the student filling out a Z.A.P. form, then being called out of class a few minutes before their last class of the day ended and brought to the library where they had to complete the missing assignment.
This year, the Z.A.P. program opened up to the other disciplines, including Art, and I jumped right on board. Seriously, the only way a kid can do poorly in my class is to NOT do the work at all. And you'd be surprised at how many kids chose not to do my fun (obviously) and relatively easy SINGLE homework assignment every week. Because of my school spirit, if you will, I thought it would be fun to get some sort of space gun that made a zapping sound for those deserving of a Z.A.P. I immediately came home and shopped my beloved ebay and found this obnoxious piece of equipment.
Wouldn't you know it, a day later while I was checking out at Bed, Bath and Beyond (another favorite haunt), I saw this darling little ray gun key chain near the cash register. I had to have it! A teacher can't have too many fake guns in class, can she? (Note the size difference)
While I waited for the Jumbo Zapper to come in the mail, I introduced the kids to my Baby Zapper and they got a real kick out of its little "peuw peuw" sound and light up barrel. I didn't seem to offend anyone when they got ZAPPED and I only ever have one or two in every period now that they know I'm serious.
Last week Mr. Postman finally delivered my anticipated Jumbo Zapper, and it is even more obnoxious than it looks. It has a light up spinning disk in the center, the tip moves back and forth and it makes more of a machine gun sound. Loudly.
I was so excited to introduce it in class, mostly because I like to make the kids laugh (I'll be the first to admit, it's an ego boost). They all thought it was funny. Until... going around checking homework, I came to one student in who did not have their homework. I pulled the Jumbo Zapper out from under my arm and announced, "You know what THAT means..." I gave the student a few rounds from the JZ (Jumbo Zapper) and the look on their face... I'll never forget it. The student was not entertained by me drawing attention to them in the slightest. I kept JZ on the DL for the rest of the period and, that night while trying to fall asleep, thought about what it would sound like if this student were to tell their parents about what happened in class today. Now, mind you, the atmosphere in my class is light and fun and I make a joke out of almost everything to maintain that feeling. But I thought about how, "My teacher pointed a toy gun at me in class today for not having my homework" would sound if spoken outside of room 185. Then I imagined the television announcing: "Teacher points toy gun at student for not having their homework. Story at 11:00."
Needless to say, I love my job, so I have retired the Jumbo Zapper, albeit a short-lived career in room 185. I think I'll just use it on my own kids at home when they don't eat their veggies. J/K.